The single most important relationship skill is not communication, it’s taking ownership.
Successful relationships require taking ownership of your “experience.”
WHAT IS YOUR “EXPERIENCE?”
Your “experience” is what happens inside your body and your mind in response to events. It is composed of your thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations.
Your experience is involuntary, it just “happens.” It’s neither good or bad or right or wrong. Your experience is always OK and valid.
YOUR THOUGHTS
We spend a lot of time in our head listening to our thoughts. Sometimes thoughts just pop into our consciousness automatically, and sometimes we direct our thoughts with intentionality to solve a problem, express ourselves, make a decision, etc.
And some of our thoughts are judgments. A “judgment” is making a meaning or interpretation in response to an event (right, wrong, good, bad, theory, explanation, reasoning, logic, etc).
FACTS VS. JUDGMENTS
Read the rest of this entry »